I've been having a gut feeling lately that something isn't right between Matt and I. I can't quite figure it out. It's almost like he's been hiding something from me. It started last week and it's been growing stronger every day. I've confronted him about it but he says there isn't anything he's keeping from me. I dunno everything seems so odd. I've been off of work for about four days now. Sunday was my birthday. Over the weekend we stayed at his Mom's house to take care of her dog and keep an eye on the house and had my birthday there. Then that Sunday we went with my grandma and she took me out to eat at Fatz Cafe. It was delicious however he acted so strange the entire time. I know he wasn't feeling well and he got sick, but before that he was still acting weird. Then yesterday I had to go over to my Mom's because my Uncle was there and I wanted to see him. Well, when I got home he was gone. He had told my grandma that he was going over to a friend's house. He never told her who. I figured it was one of the guys..around 11:30 I still haven't heard anything from him. It was getting late and he had left his cell phone at the house. I was really worried and had an awful feeling. So of course I went through his phone and called one of his guy friends. Thankfully he was over there. But I dunno what's going on. But I have a bad feeling and I'm not liking it. Not at all. I'm really nervous and scared. I hope it's nothing awful. :(

xoxo
  Beth

1. I wanna grow old and tell stories about how God has been there for me and keep his name strong and powerful.
2. Write a book.
3. Write another complete song from the piano.
4. Tell him how I truly feel no matter what the consequences may be.
5. Overcome my fears.
6. Overcome what people says about who I choose to love.
7. Wake up one morning and do what I want to do. Seriously, just have a Me day!
8. I wanna make love at the beach.
9. I wanna be married at the church I grew up in.
10.I wanna have three kids.
11. I wanna have a healthy relationship.
12. I wanna live a long life and tell all my stories.
13. I wanna be there for my family & friends.
14. I wanna go sky diving.
15. I wanna jump off a bridge. (BUNGIE JUMP) :)

Good morning beautiful! It's bright and sunny out side today. To bad I have to work tonight and can't spend a day out in the beautiful sunshine. I just woke up and I need to get motivated. I have so much that needs to be accomplished before I go into work. Like laundry and possibly clean out my car and I have to take care of my dog, call and check up on my mom, and most of all find time for myself and my love!  Time is going by to fast these days. The older you get the faster it goes by. I never understood that. Well, I've gotta run and get started on making this day right and praying for a fantastic day and  I know God will be by my side through it all.

xoxo
 Beth.